Speaking of Arguing...

I remember being asked on one of the first days of class who had been in an argument before in their lives.  Everyone raised their hands because, we determined, everyone has different viewpoints and perspectives that are important to them.  Since then and because we have been discussing argument so relentlessly, I've found myself acutely aware of every argument I have been in since.  I've found myself, for the most part, to have a much better handle on keeping these arguments very civil and smart.  I think that this is mostly a direct result of knowing and addressing my audience by trying to understand what their perspective is.

Yesterday, I had a bit of a different argument with some friends that led me to question this line of thinking.  It was a very heated debate, and I am certain more than one of us left with hurt feelings.  It was a topic I am extremely passionate about and consider myself very well educated on.  But the problem was that because of this passion I was completely incapable of seeing and considering the reverse opinion—and she was completely unwilling to see mine.  

I know that understanding the other perspective is key in arguing, and I was aware of the nagging in the back of my mind telling me so as we continued to shoot biting comments back and forth, but I almost felt as if I was too close to the topic to separate myself.  Has anyone else had an experience like this before? Have you found a way to overcome it? Anger and passion are a key to argument, I think.  But it seems to me that you have to be careful not to have too much.